Yes, I know it's been a week since I've updated...

Seriously, nothing is happening right now. There are currently no movies I'm jonesing to see in the theaters. My last Netflix rental sucked. I am, however, listening to a really cool cd by a band called Grizzly Bear. The cd is titled Yellow House. It's sort of trip folk...kinda. It's really mellow and sort of surreal. I don't know that I'd listen to it in the car, but it's perfect for at home.

Rather than dull you with the usual stories of unboxing books, I will tell you of a customer phone call I fielded today. I picked up the call and an older woman says to me "Your screen won't let me enter my security number. Why?"

Thank goodness I speak Crazy Elderly Person. I determine that she is talking about the website and she is referring to the security number on her credit card. I try and get her to look for the help options on the site, but she can't seem to place them. I ask if she's tried backing out of this part of the order and starting the paying process again. I ask if she tried entering the number more than once. She says she's done it six times and it keeps saying it is incorrect. I ask if she's entered the correct number, and she swears she has. I tell her, it must be something with the page itself, some sort of glitch, and I can't fix that on my end since we at the store have NOTHING TO DO WITH THE WEBSITE.

She asks if I can order the books at the store. I say, sure I can and ask her for the first title. Well...she didn't note down the titles as she was browsing so she needs to back out of the order and get the list.

I always get scared when they use the word "list." Anyway, she says she's going to do that and then call back. She asks if she should ask for me when she calls back. I explain that anyone who works here can place the order, it doesn't necessarily need to be me. Of course, I'm trying to make sure she doesn't ask for me as I can see where this is going. I hang up and think that is the end of it.

A good 20 or so minutes go by so I think I'm safe. The phone rings and I answer and, you guessed it, it's her. She doesn't realize she's already spoken to me so she starts to go into her thing. She says she "called the office" and the girl there told her it was okay to order over the phone. I don't bother to point out it was me.

Now, from the previous conversation I know she has two authors she's looking for. Boy was I off. She has 5 authors for a total of 13 books. Crap.

I note them down then put her on hold to go looking. I find 10 of them in the store and will have to order the other 3. I place the order. Oh, she wants them shipped to her home. I get that set up, but the printer at this particular computer isn't working. I copy down the order number, but leave off a digit so when I try to ring it up it won't work. I put her on hold again and go to another computer to print the order, because we don't have printers at the cash registers.

I come back up to the front and ring up that order first. I enter in her credit card number, and because I'm not actually swiping the card I have to enter THE SECURITY NUMBER! Great. She reads it off to me and, no surprise, it's not correct. She gives it to me again. I ask her if her card is American Express. She says yes, and I tell her the number is on the front of the card.

"The front?"

Yes, the front.

"Oh, the number I gave you was on the back. Try this number..."

That worked. Guess we know why the number you were trying online kept getting rejected.

"Well, I've never tried it online before."

ARRGHHHH!!!! During the first phone call, she'd sworn up and down she'd used this card online at our site before.

Of course, it now hits me that because she mixed up the numbers, I have spent all this time with her instead of dealing with the boxes I have still piled up in back.

I ring up the books from within the store and remember that I need to ask if she has a membership card. She doesn't and asks me about it, decides she wants to get one and oh, yeah, add on a gift certificate for her niece.

I will say, she was pleasant all the way through this whole ordeal, which makes taking the time to help that much more tolerable. But, I also need to mention that I spent 55 MINUTES HELPING HER!!! I picked up the phone at 5:50 (as soon as I knew it was her I noted down the time) and I got back to my desk at 6:45. I sure hope she liked our hold music.

Gimmie Some McLovin

I probably should not have liked Superbad as much as I did given I am not a guy between the ages of 18-25. Like all good coming of age comedies, Superbad is full of crude humor. There are dick jokes galore, most of them funny. There are plenty of jokes about sex, getting laid, getting anything really...and most of those are funny too. But, unlike some of those types of comedies, this movie actually has a sweet center to it. The basic plot goes like this--Evan and Seth have been best friends forever and had been planning on going to college together, but Seth wasn't able to get into Dartmouth (sp? obviously I didn't get in their either) so they will be separating after the summer. They have two weeks left of school and are trying to get through these two weeks as best they can. They aren't the popular kids, but they aren't complete geeks either. Like most of us, they sort of fall into the middle. They get invited to a party being thrown by the girl that Seth has a crush on. Their third friend told them he was about to get a fake ID so the boys offer to pick up the liquor for the party.

Craziness and hilarity ensue.

The action takes place during one evening. The kid picking up the fake ID has chosen the name McLovin for himself. Just McLovin--no first name. Oh, and he's gotten an ID from Hawaii. While attempting to buy the liquor, the store he is at is robbed. When the other guys see the cops, they get the wrong impression and ditch their friend. What follows is a strange journey involving attempts to secret away liquor from another party, being forced to sing to a bunch of guys doing coke, joyriding with the cops, and general misunderstandings.

Ultimately, they end up together at the party with the liquor and then it becomes about their attempts to woo the girls they like...or in McLovin's case, the girl whose ass he was following earlier that day in school. Throughout there is plenty of cussing, sex talk, and some insights into how bizarre a friendship can be as you try to make your way through the hormonal hell that is high school.

Overall, I thought the humor fit the tone of the film. The guys definitely yapped about sex a lot, but they're 18, what do you want? Evan, played by Michael Cera from Arrested Development, seems genuinely concerned about having an actual relationship with the girl he likes, as opposed to just wanting to bang her. And for all his big talk, Seth too is a big softie when you come down to it.

I thought the best bits included many of the scenes at the high school, the scene where Seth is explaining to the teacher just how lame home ec is was great. I also liked McLovin's attempt to get the liquor. Most of the scenes between Seth and Evan showed off what seemed to be a genuine best friend relationship and all that entails.

I thought the bits with the cops, while several of them were funny, almost seemed to broad for what the rest of the film was trying to do. I also thought the "blood on the pants" bit detracted from the feel of the film. For me, as a chick, I instantly thought--a guy wrote this--because it was just a bit out of the realm of believability. It didn't really gross me out. It just didn't seem plausible--especially after a second person gets blood on his pants. I know that doesn't make sense, but once you see the movie, you'll understand. I also thought a guy wrote this during some of the scenes involving the behaviour of some of the girls. Not that I thought these things weren't possible, I just thought we've already seen this before. The movie is still definitely worth checking out, even with some plot mis-steps.

Not much else going on this vacation. I have been enjoying the Little League World Series on ESPN/ESPN 2 the last few days. I watched a really good Japan vs. China Taipai game today when I got home. Japan won by the way in 10 innings (normally they play 6).

Also found out the best way to freak out employees at a sandwich shop. Talk on your cell phone loudly about bad weather. The skies were really dark as I was leaving the movie, but I could tell that it was blowing over town really quickly. While I was getting lunch, the guy behind me got a call about some nasty stuff north of us. Some big ass tree got blown over. He starts saying things about warnings and how some radio station he listens to had gone to static. About 2 seconds after he leaves, the girls behind the counter proclaim that if their families/friends called them about any warnings in the area they would not hesitate to leave, regardless of who was around. Sweet, I thought. Free cookies for dessert. Dorks.

100 and counting

Here we are...my 100th blog entry. Not surprisingly, it's about a movie.

Stardust is the movie adaptation of Neil Gaiman's book/graphic novel. I loved the book, but it's been a few years since I've read it. To me, Stardust was always an adult fairy tale. And by adult I don't mean wacka-jah-wownn (uh...that would be may way of spelling the sound of a '70's porno guitar), I mean a story full of fantasy and other worldliness that isn't so sickly sweet you can't stomach it.

Tristian, played by relative newcomer Charlie Cox, works in a shop in his small English village. He desperately wants to impress one particular girl, who, of course, doesn't want anything to do with him. After he makes a really romantic gesture, she decides to have a bit of fun and agrees to marry him if he brings back a fallen star that they have just seen shoot across the heavens. To get the star, he must cross The Wall and go into parts unknown. Parts that have been protected 24/7 forever.

The star manifests itself into the form of a young woman, Claire Danes, upon falling to Stronghold (that would be parts unknown). Tristian selfishly attempts to bring her back with him and the adventure begins. We have sky pirates, witches, unicorns, you name it. Just enough fantasy to take you out of where you are, but not so much to become too cutesy. We also have romance, humor, and action--and not just the swashbuckling kind.

I'll admit it. My major problem with fantasy is the idea that cats talk and act like people. There is at least one series of books at the store where the cats date and shit. That's just too messed up for me.

Anyway, Matthew Vaughn, who directed Layer Cake (which you should definitely rent, even with Sienna Miller in it), handles the demands of both telling a rich story and working with loads of special effects. To me though, the best effect was the English landscape. Of course, now that I've said this it'll end up it was filmed in Bulgaria or something. I should take time to look things up now and again.

Cox and Danes work very well together. Robert De Niro ends up coming just this short of camp with his performance, which is a good thing. And, Michelle P. (seriously, I don't know how to spell her name...sorry) is deliciously wicked. I also enjoyed the bevy of British talent appearing throughout the film. I kept thinking, oooo, I've seen him in Spaced....look, it's Inspector Lynley...damn, Rupert Everett's face looks funny flat.

I think this would be a great movie to see for adult date night, or with the family. Some younger kids (10 or younger) may be put off by some parts and it is over 2 hours long, so take that into consideration. Still, you can't beat a movie that features Mr. Weasley as a former goat, who can only go "bahhh" and jump onto the top of the bar with no effort.

FYI:

Vacation week starts tomorrow. And, for those of you thinking, holy crap how much vacation time does she get anyway...let me just say, I earn every freakin' second of it.

I'm planning on going to see Superbad (McLovin!!!!) and watch some rented stuff too so I will hopefully have something to blog about. Obviously, my usual well of store bitching will be temporarily dried up. Till number 101, good night.

EDITING NOTE: I have tried 3 times to get spacing between my paragraphs and so far it hasn't worked. Don't be surprised if the 4th try fails too. Sorry.

No One Wants To Grow Up

You may be asking the following question. Why a picture of the cast of Facts Of Life? The bigger question for me...WHY NOT?!

It has recently struck me that everyone has held on to a trait or behaviour from their youth. I'm not talking about some cute sort of thing. I'm talking about the sort of trait you wish would just disappear. The sort of trait that rears its ugly head at your worst or weakest moments.

I have often complained at work that some of my fellow employees act like 8 yr. olds. Behaving like a petulant child is not the best thing to do past the age of 12. And on someone over 30, it is even worse. I am not above such behaviour, believe me. I know a split second before it happens that it is going to happen, and some of the time I am unable to stop it.

Why the hell can't I stop it? Am I, in some truly deep seeded way, clinging on to my youth? Am I unable to handle the world as an adult so I revert to being a child? Is being a real adult just too damn scary at times?

I know one of my big shortcomings (er...oxymoron anyone?) is taking things too personally. Well, let me clarify that statement. Most of the time, I take things too personally when the comments come from people I respect. The people I want to please, or impress, or have like me are the people I worry over the most. Everyone else I could give a poo less about.

How is it so easy to recognize my childish attitude, yet so hard to really get rid of it? I know this is all a bit rambling. I'm trying to figure something out without really telling you all the situation that lead up to this particular thought getting caught in my head. Boy, today's blog sucks.

On to other random things:

I hate being my age and still having crushes.

Strange Days is a better film than you think.

Becoming Jane was disappointing. Should have had more of her wit.

Sort of on the same topic...we need more balls to dance at...and they must be filmed on a beautiful English estate.

Writing a year end performance review for someone who has worked for you for about 3 weeks is easily one of the most annoying and dumbest things a person can do.

Love the first single from the new Foo Fighters cd. That would be "The Pretender."

And finally, the next blog will be better. Probably.

PS. Laura got the quote. It is from The Breakfast Club. I'm working on the next one.